Seemingly harmless

I’ve been absent from here for… well, let’s just leave it at “awhile”… and it’s far past time for me to return to written words.

Over the past year, some amazing things have happened in my life. It was definitely a difficult year, and successes are equally balanced with failures and losses.

But today, I want to highlight inspiration from someone else. A deeply personal post on Facebook by a dear friend.

Since I read her post this morning, I’ve been milling around about how to write about it, but I had to ultimately admit that I can’t do it any better, so here are her words.

Hey guys. I want to take a moment for a serious post. Recently I’ve found myself really angry at a lot of “seemingly harmless” posts. When I stopped to take a look, I realized I was seeing an attitude towards my gender, that I.am.not.okay.with. The reason goes deeper than being tired of being told I need to look one way so that my worth is increased, that I need to behave a certain way because my feelings come second to someone else’s comfort, and all of the other *daily* bs I put up with. It is something more.

The night my sister was killed, her neighbors (apartment complex) heard her scream. The whole time. They heard her daughter crying. No one did anything. No one picked up the phone and called the cops. They could have saved two lives that night.

Think about that. A woman screamed for her life and people were too uncomfortable to do the right thing. She screamed for over two hours.

Why? Why do we silence one gender to the point that it becomes acceptable as a society to literally ignore cries for help.

Jesus.Fucking.Christ.

I will never stay silent.

If you can’t see the connection, then if I may. My dad told me something growing up. Ideas start as seeds planted. Just like domestic violence, it starts small. Criticism, belittling, dismissing, before it becomes angry, loud and so on, before it becomes physical. Now, this isn’t to say that all men are abusers. There a female abusers too. Either way, it is never okay. Now, I know a lot of amazing men. I know that they would never raise their hand in anger towards a partner.

But I see a lot of the same attitudes and honestly, it scares me. Because we are all just human at the end of the day. You never know what you will do in a situation, until you are there. What are we teaching our children? Our future?

What is it that I’m seeing? That I should just “have a sense of humor” about? There was a commercial recently I saw on T.V. recently. A man is jogging in the park and a small stature woman is holding on to his back. A narrator is heard saying something akin to “No one likes a stage 5 clinger” (If you don’t understand the reference, ask and I will elaborate) The next shot is of a logo on the side of a toilet seen dissipating as water starts to flush. A woman (in any facet, “crazy” or not) was literally compared to shit. Fecal matter. But it’s okay because “It’s funny.”

Yeah, I’m not laughing. I’m not okay with that attitude anymore. No, I’m not being “over sensitive.” I don’t need to “Have a sense of humor!” about it. It’s not funny anymore.

Alexis Meza via Facebook post, February 3, 2016

Please take a few moments to digest this. Let it roll around in your head and spill over into your heart.

Then share it. And share it again. And again.

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Seemingly harmless

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